Elevator Etiquette: Let people exit before you enter. That way you have more room to enter. This applies to all things, not just elevators.
Trains, buses, gangbangs…
But how else are you going to turn a gang bang into a train?
HUMAN Centipede
Let the people out of the elevator that are trying to get out of the elevator before you attempt getting in.
Elevator, all public transport, buildings. There’s more space outside. Stop cramping.
Yes! And to those getting out: don’t stop or walk super slow the moment you are out, people are trying to get in, get out of the way!
And escalators. I forgot one of the reasons I hated shopping with my ex but this past weekend we had to get some stuff for our kid. Sure enough, STOPPED as she stepped off the escalator. Wtf
Ditto buses and subways
Zipper merging.
If your lane is closing ahead, it is better for everyone in traffic if you drive all the way to the end of the lane and cut in at the last moment.
Note that this does not apply to exit lanes. The basic rule is if late merging blocks someone from going somewhere, merge early. Otherwise, merge as late as you can.
I usually try to practice this (or at least make room for others to merge in) but last week the zipper merge took place right where an entrance ramp was also trying to merge creating a 3-way merge clusterfuck. Whoever put up the traffic cones should’ve been shot. Or… done a better job. All they had to do was complete the first merge before the entrance ramp, but no.
I was lucky enough to have already been in the left-most lane, at least.
I really can’t more strongly disagree with this take.
Zipper merging is to interleave two lanes of traffic when there’s one lane of traffic available ahead.
It DOES NOT matter if it’s done with 3 feet to merge or 300 feet to merge. There’s no efficiency gain.
What does matter is some assholes trying to merge at speed at the last possible second.
The zipper point should not be the point where there’s NO ROOM to merge SAFELY without EVERYONE going 3 miles per hour.
The handful of times I’ve seen a zipper merge actually start to work, someone rushes down to the end of the line where the problem is, nearly causes a second accident trying to get over, and then everything starts moving at a crawl again.
You don’t need to zipper merge at the “physical barrier” causing the zipper merge to be necessary.
It DOES NOT matter if it’s done with 3 feet to merge or 300 feet to merge. There’s no efficiency gain.
Merging early leaves unused road. Shoving the cars into fewer lanes makes the traffic jam longer and makes it impact more interesections far behind the actual hangup. If you can merge early without slowing down, sure go for it. I’m mostly talking about the scenarios where it’s already slowed to a crawl and people feel like they have to merge early to not be seen as “cutting in line.”
Edit, also to add, if everyone merges early even at speed, eventually, the car density in the reduced lanes will reach a point where people naturally slow down and you have bumper to bumper traffic.
I suggest Traffic by Tom Vanderbilt for more.
“Unused road” is ridiculous except in extremes. Unless people merge well over a mile back, 1 lane of traffic will make no difference. The only way “unused road” matters is for the people that haven’t entered the traffic jam yet who are getting off before they reach it.
Very few people (from what I’ve seen) merge more than 30 car lengths out. 30 cars is not going to make a difference.
What does make a difference is the fact that we can’t do a merge at speed because some people want to “zipper late.” It’s the zipper behavior that matters, the “at the very end” part never should’ve been added to that recommendation.
Looking at an actual research paper about this, the zipper merge demonstrated is not at the last possible point. A merge point forms ahead of that point and that’s what should be used. The pictures from their study show the zipper occurring over a wide area with many of the zipped cars driving in the middle.
https://rosap.ntl.bts.gov/view/dot/35694
I don’t know how studies like this have become the recommendations we have. They seem to me to miss critical bits.
Edit: based on my quick read, it’s worth noting the study finds only minimal support for the zipper merge and only in contexts not involving trucks largely based on visual analysis from their video feed as the quantitative data was not statistically significant. We need better transparency on recommendations like this frankly and the research supporting them. We should be able to have an honest debate on the merits of the papers.
Zipper merge isn’t a thing where I live. It’s advised in the provincial drivers’ handbook to merge early. Some folks from other provinces are trying to change things but it’s too ingrained, been this way for as long as I can remember.
Merging early when at speed makes sense, because you still have a lot of lane left before you have to merge - less pressure, more time, less likely to make a bad decision.
Merging late during slow traffic makes sense, as it allows you to align with gaps in the traffic and for the traffic to make space for you without having to actually stop.
The problem with zipper merges as this person describes them is a zipper merge is SUPPOSED TO get traffic back up to speed. However, when your take on the zipper merge is “up there where the wreck is at the last possible spot I can merge” there’s no time for a human to safely merge at speed. So everything has to continue at a crawl.
So the people jumping out of their lane and “zipper merging” at the last second instead of 50 feet out or so end up making things worse for everyone.
The zipper does not and should not be at the point of the physical problem on the road. Just like you should not just drive to the end of the on ramp and at the last possible second merge into the lane on your left without paying attention.
That’s what I said?
Merge early at speed, merge late during congestion
Reading the answers to this questions, I’d say “Not understanding the meaning of most people”.
There’s really only two of them:
- Don’t be stupid.
- Don’t be a dick.
They’re not even unspoken, people say them all the time, but some people just don’t pay attention I guess.
You’re absolutely correct, but lol this is really weird given your other comments in this post.
Why didn’t you clarify about edge cases, like disabilities?
Unfortunately, the current capitalist system in place for most of the world is incompatible with most people to varying degrees. This leads to people not sleeping as much as they should, which makes people stupid and behave like dicks.
I mean there are lots of reasons for people to be stupid/be a dick; the point is to rise above that shit. I get it tho, I was born in the 70s so I’ve been watching this world backslide into shit for nigh on 50 years now, it just keeps bombarding you with more and more shit. But if you let ‘fuck it I’m tired’ be an excuse then you’re not even trying anymore.
Give LOTS of space when passing a bike in your car.
Give EVEN MORE when passing a horse.
When driving, you should engage your turn signal before you start applying the brakes in preparation for your turn.
This is my husband’s “pet peeve”, as he puts it. “Don’t just throw on your brake in the middle of the road! Why are you slowing down? Signal!”
I originally got this one from an Actual Advice Mallard meme.
Also, related to proper use of turn signals, you should signal well in advance of your turn. The rule of thumb I learned was your signal should be on for three seconds of before you turn, assuming you’re currently in motion. Additionally, you should actually use your turn signal. Far too many people seem to be scared of the blinken lights. There is no reason not to use your turn signal.
- Changing lanes? Signal.
- Turning from a turn-only lane? Signal.
- Backing out of your drive-way? Signal.
- Pulling out of a parking spot? Signal.
- Moving the steering-wheel for any reason other than continuing to follow the curvature of your lane? Signal.
- Driving in a post-apocalyptic wasteland where you are confirmed to be the sole living thing left on the planet and doing any of the above? Signal.
If you’re turning and think you have a reason not to use your turn signal, you’re wrong. Fucking Signal.
I nearly died the first time I turned the blinker on in the new car. I was changing lanes and I put the blinker on to signal I was heading over their. I saw the car next to me and was signaling to let everyone else know I was going to go over when it was clear. Then the car started making all these noise and scared the crap out of me. Come to find out the car warns you with a loud audible alarm if their is a car near your blind spot.
Anyway just wanted to share
Cant you just fucking read the mind of the person in front? They are clearly thinking of turning way ahead. Sometimes before they enter the car.
When driving, if you plan on turning from the turn lane, switch lanes and THEN slow down to turn. Don’t slow to a crawl before leaving the driving lane.
The rearview mirror (the one that hangs off the windshield) is for seeing directly behind you. Your side mirrors are for seeing things to the right and left of you. If the driver directly behind you can see your face in your side mirrors, or you can see their front windshield, and your rearview mirror both exists and is unobstructed, then you are driving around unreasonably blind to vehicles overtaking you. This blind spot can be almost completely eliminated.
The side mirrors should be positioned thus that you have a clear view of the lanes next to you, with the door handle or body of the vehicle just slightly out of view. You can lean and tilt your head if for some reason you prefer a view of what’s going on behind you that is half obstructed by the vehicle you are currently driving.
The goal is to maximize the area covered by the mirrors so you can see more things, not to have redundant views of the same thing.
Push your chair in after leaving a table at a cafeteria. It blocks the path for people who are carrying trays and may not have a free hand to push it in themselves.
When exiting an airplane, it is more efficient to remain in your row until the row ahead of you has accessed their belongings. This includes people that have no overhead luggage. Sometimes someone’s overhead luggage is behind their seat and it causes noticeable congestion/delays if there are people standing in the aisle obstructing their path. An exception could be made for patrons that need extra time for mobility issues, but this is usually arranged in advance with the flight attendants. Having said that, it’s best to make every effort to exit with expediency because there could be others that have very little time to reach their connecting flight.
It’s safe to generally assume that most others are equally (or more) tired of being on the plane and want to leave ASAP.
Put your cart back when you’re done shopping.
I’ll leave this here: https://youtube.com/@cartnarcs
Looks like it’s time to test the waters of Lemmy. This one has generally gone over poorly on reddit every time it’s come up, so let’s find out how it does here:
What about people who have a high degree of difficulty getting around? A good friend of mine has a herniated disc and a bunch of neurological issues as a result of a car accident he was in, he walks with one of those rolling walkers at a very slow speed grunting and groaning the entire time, and that was at the best of times. He barely manages shopping by using those electric cart things, but with all the reaching and bending he has to do, by the time he got back out to the car he was sweating like crazy and in obvious pain, even with my help. The idea of expecting someone in that situation to endure another couple minutes of horrendous pain just to make someone else’s life very slightly more convenient by bringing his cart back up to the store even from the handicapped parking spaces strikes me as absurd, but he can’t always get help with his shopping so I know he has to sometimes.
I think rules, written or otherwise, should have exceptions to account for extreme circumstances like this, but a lot of online people just go ‘No, if you don’t bring your cart back you’re a BAD PERSON no matter what!’.
The major problem with this kind of pattern is you’re looking to establish edge-case boundaries, rather than the most broadly applicable standard. The attempt to document and "solve for every case just leads to overly complicated and disingenuous discussions. Our fascination and obsession with “accuracy and precision” as applied to human behavior is one that breaks down very quickly unless you’re attempting to be hyper-rational, at which point, any rules assigned to human behavior break down.
In short, “use your best judgement.”
Note: I think that we have passed the golden moment where “human judgement” had any kind of value. There was a long time where we (all humanity) were stumbling in the dark, and we have now stepped back into that cave. But for a brief, shining moment, the percentage of people who had critical reasoning skills was growing, and it was majestic.
What I’m looking to do is point out that the world isn’t ever black-and-white, that the broadly applicable standards - while I agree that they are in fact broadly applicable - are never universal, and that edge-cases exist everywhere and need to be accounted for or the world is just a worse place for everyone. I’m not saying ‘your solution must handle solve for every case’, I’m saying ‘be aware that your solution needs to be flexible enough to account the fact that the real world is messy and things are never as simple as you’d like to believe.’
I am specifically, as you say, advocating for the use of best judgement over moral absolutes (I have heard it said, in person and online, that anyone who doesn’t put a shopping cart back no matter the reason is a shit human being, f.ex, so there are definitely people out there slinging moral absolutes on the subject of shopping carts.)
I highly doubt you have heard a significant number of people who would genuinely say “disabled people who don’t put their carts back are shit people.”
The number of people who would unironically say that is such a small edge case that it’s not necessary to talk about them when you say things like “everyone knows that disabilities result in different needs and moral responsibilities,” just like it’s not necessary to mention disability when you generalize and say “people who don’t put their carts back are shit people.”
Edge cases don’t have to be accounted for in every conversation, not everything is a court of law.
This isn’t really any more deep than “only a sith deals in absolutes”
Not a significant number, no, but also not zero. No the common refrain is as I said it, with the implication that anyone who doesn’t for any reason is a shit human being, and Iono if you know this, but disabled people are part of ‘anyone’ too. My whole point is that they make blanket statements about a thing that annoys them without realizing that some of those carts are out there for some pretty good reasons actually.
Put your cart back when you’re done shopping
OP didn’t make a blanket statement that “anyone who does X is a piece of shit.”
He said an unwritten rule, like your own statement:
Don’t be stupid
Which is significantly closer to ableism than the shopping carts, with the implication that anyone who is stupid is a piece of shit.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with saying “don’t be stupid,” for the record, but in case you weren’t aware, people with brain damage are included under “anyone.”
You’ve picked a bizarrely specific hill to die on.
that is such a small edge case that it’s not necessary to talk about them
Did you manage to overlook this point?
Of course there are exceptions to every rule. Likewise, “don’t talk loudly on your phone in public” is a rule everyone should know, but no one’s going to judge you if you’re talking loudly on your phone to 911 because you just saw someone get hit by a car.
You can’t call the police or an ambulance if you’re at the movies!
I think I understand what you are saying, able bodied people can easily forget there are others who have a hard time doing “basic” and “easy” tasks.
I agree with some of the replies you got about being unnecessary and time consuming to state every exception to something but I think that what you pointed out is still very valid. Depending on the culture people grow up in and their personal experiences, stating something like " disabled people sometimes are not able to put the shopping carts back" could be either extremely obvious for them or not at all. Some people will think it’s just about not bothering others with a task that they could easily take care of themselves, others will think about safety like one of the replies you got talking about the wind (I’ve never thought about that one tbh), some will think about damaging people’s property (cars) and others about not giving workers more problems. I think we can all agree that abandoning the cart is bad, even if we are thinking about different reasons, however a lot of people will just blame lazy people for leaving it anywhere and totally forget about disabled people not having other options because it isn’t something that is a part of their lifes.
I wouldn’t say that people not being constantly aware of disabled people having a harder time is inherently ableist, unless they do it on purpose of course, but bringing awareness to the existence of the many obstacles they face in different scenarios is important to make changes that make their life’s easier. Abandoning the cart can also make disabled people’s life harder, for example if it is blocking the safest route for mobility aid users or blind people, wich is something that able bodied people should also take into consideration (and most disabled people who need to leave it somewhere actually take into consideration).
Bringing awareness can make changes, maybe next time someone here sees someone with mobility issues they will ask them if they need help or if they need them to return the cart to its place, changing the place to leave the carts so it is next to disabled parking spots could be planned and requested to stores. Maybe some people will become more aware of the obstacles that others face in their daily lifes.
There are always outliers and exceptions to rules, they are usually not who/what is being discussed lol
You say usually, but I’ve seen quite a few people (on the internet and off) who like to make blanket statements like ‘Anyone who doesn’t put the shopping cart back is a shit human being’, so it frequently is what is being discussed, and those folks have to be reminded that the world is not as black and white as they’d like to imagine.
Nah man, language is messy and people are lazy. Language is messy meaning people generally don’t get so detail oriented and pedantic when someone says an absolute that clearly has some exceptions. People are lazy meaning most people aren’t going to care to hash out the specifics of the edge cases that don’t fit the generic statement.
Your test seems to be more about how pedantic everyone is, and god I hope Lemmy loses that to reddit…
Yeah that was definitely a thing I saw a lot more on reddit than here re:‘shit human being’, so fair point, I’m with you in hoping that kind of thing doesn’t come over here/goes away.
The carts go back in the corral so they don’t damage other people’s cars, not for convenience. I’m sorry your friend is hurt but my property shouldn’t be damaged because of that. And nobody’s going to judge him if he leaves it next the handicapped parking space he was in. Anyway, all the grocery stores by me will literally send someone to push the cart and put your groceries in the car for you if you’re unable. The cashiers will even straight up ask if they think you need help.
He always puts them in a place where they won’t be in the way of other cars, lifts a wheel up onto a curb or something so it won’t be blown around by the wind, etc. He is not damaging anyone’s property.
Also I’ve been with him to help him shop several times and never seen anyone offer (and he says he they never offer when he’s by himself), so maybe it’s different where you live? shrug That sounds pretty great for his situation tho.
If he’s putting it up on the curb he’s doing the best for his situation and to me that’s fine. The damage comes from people leaving them just laying around and then the wind picks up. I have been around the block a few times it’s true but in my life I’ve saved at least 3 people’s cars from getting dented by carts I saw flying through the parking lot because of wind.
Does he ask for help? Even if it’s not a normal thing at that store, a nice conversation with a store manager can go a long way in my experience. Maybe it’s because I live in a neighborhood with a significant amount of older folks (at least that’s what it looks like at the grocery store!) but I bet any grocery will do that if you ask.
Fair enough. Yeah fuck leaving it out in the middle of everything or where it can roll/be blown away. If my buddy who gets winded walking to the bathroom can manage it so can everyone else. Although I guess to be fair there are more likely to be curbs near the handicap parking than for most other people, though also they have working legs and cart corrals, so…
Thats like saying ik murders bad but what if the guy you killled kidnapped your whole family and held them hostage, like nah shit well consider it being okay in that case, but that is a fringe case far from common
Equating not putting the shopping cart back with murder is a bit fucking hyperbolic. One of those ends the life of another person and the other very slightly inconveniences them at most. And I now I can’t even take you seriously enough to read the rest of your admittedly-short post after a statement like that.
Not every comparison is literal, and you focused on the wrong part.
Maybe tuck the godawful analogies away til the end next time then? shrug
I think rules, written or otherwise, should have exceptions to account for extreme circumstances like this, but a lot of online people just go ‘No, if you don’t bring your cart back you’re a BAD PERSON no matter what!’.
To treat any rule as immutable is an idealist junk perspective. Rules, like all ideas, need to be applied to a context, and I personally don’t see the point in codifying every possible exception. Law officials, programmers and others can tell you how Sisyphean that task would be.
So yes, there are exceptions (obviously!). If you’re putting your cart back and you injure your leg, you don’t have to crawl on your arms just to put it back. But we can still generally say “people should put their cart back after shopping” and it’s clear that we’re generalizing.
Zipper merging
lol this and bad drivers are the most reposted shit on my cities subreddit. ALWAYS zipper merging and bad drivers.
It’s sad people don’t understand the concept of zipper merging because of their ME FIRST attitude
Minneapolis?
Omaha
All of Illinois has joined the chat.
I’ve never had a driving license in my life and I somehow fully understood zipper merging as a toddler. “Oh, everyone gets their turn! This side goes, then that side goes, then this side goes again back and forth so it’s fair for everyone.”
One could write a book on unspoken rules for tipping in the US. Do you tip on takeout? Do you tip baristas? Does it depend on the beverage? Do you tip if you sit down but bus your own table? What’s considered a good tip (and this is situation-dependent)? The only thing I can tell is if you’re worried about something happening to you, then 20% of the price is generally a safe amount.
Easy highly controversial fix : dont tip and start demanding that people are paid a living wage
Do not start or continue a phone conversation when going to the bathroom - public or private restroom but especially in public bathrooms.
About ten years ago I was talking to one of my sisters on the phone. She was in NZ, I’m in the UK, so it wasn’t an everyday thing. Evening for me, morning for her. So we’re chatting away and suddenly there’s a weird noise, like interference on the line. I remarked on it - and it turned out it was her PEEING. She somehow thought I wouldn’t hear? Bloody hell.
I’ve seen people facetiming in the men’s room.
Since the majority of people in the world are idiots, and management tends to collect them at a higher rate than other roles, you will generally be rewarded more for how you make others feel than the amount or quality of your work. A person with a 10 in charisma and 4 int gets farther than the person with a 10 int and a 7 in charisma most of the time. Focus on learning better people skills. If you find a place where your work is recognized you should cherish it.
Also in the US the left lane is for passing the right lanes.
“Do unto others…”
Even those who supposedly devote their lives to such teachings don’t seem to know wtf that means
I don’t think everyone agrees on what it’s supposed to even mean. if you want no mercy to be given to you should that mean that you shouldn’t give others mercy?
Literally the opposite. If you want mercy, you should show mercy to others…
yes, but what if you don’t want mercy?
Fair point. Maybe it doesn’t work out so well for that guy, but for the 999/1000 people who don’t want to be murdered/tortured, “do unto others” probably ends up being a net positive versus “do whatever the fuck you want as long as you can get away with it”, which seems to be the direction a lot of “leaders” are going and dragging humanity into Hell alongside them
