I feel this. I’m not socially awkward, can speak in front of a crowd just fine, but my brain just can’t figure out what “flirting” actually is. I’m aware it’s a form of conversation different from normal talking that expresses attraction, but as for how it’s different, how to do it etc.
I’m in the dark and no friend of mine has been able to give a clear answer.
It’s generally when someone is hinting at personal interest beyond the immediate conversation, or otherwise an overt complement where they might not normally show up. Complements are not flirting in their own right, but they can show up readily if someone is either genuinely interested or romantically interested. Hopefully, it won’t be hard to parse between actual direct interest in a topic and, “hey I just want more attention from you and this topic is my in.”.
It’s times like these that I’m glad I am autistic. You neurotypicals really over-complicate things and make life difficult for yourselves.
How to flirt as an autistic person: make a friend over shared interests, spend time together sharing that interest, realize they’re enjoyable to be around, communicate clearly “I enjoy spending time with you, let’s do it more often”, slowly morph into a relationship out of convenience. Done.
I cannot understand NT mind-games and obsessive preening. Don’t you get frustrated with it? And to think - someone who puts that much effort into judging you upfront is likely to keep judging things about you all your life, with no end to playing games… Stressful, no thank you.
I think nothing has ever been enough of a hindrance to be selected out evolutionarily which is why non-neurotypical people exist. Just my head theory though
I feel this. I’m not socially awkward, can speak in front of a crowd just fine, but my brain just can’t figure out what “flirting” actually is. I’m aware it’s a form of conversation different from normal talking that expresses attraction, but as for how it’s different, how to do it etc.
I’m in the dark and no friend of mine has been able to give a clear answer.
It’s generally when someone is hinting at personal interest beyond the immediate conversation, or otherwise an overt complement where they might not normally show up. Complements are not flirting in their own right, but they can show up readily if someone is either genuinely interested or romantically interested. Hopefully, it won’t be hard to parse between actual direct interest in a topic and, “hey I just want more attention from you and this topic is my in.”.
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It’s times like these that I’m glad I am autistic. You neurotypicals really over-complicate things and make life difficult for yourselves.
How to flirt as an autistic person: make a friend over shared interests, spend time together sharing that interest, realize they’re enjoyable to be around, communicate clearly “I enjoy spending time with you, let’s do it more often”, slowly morph into a relationship out of convenience. Done.
I cannot understand NT mind-games and obsessive preening. Don’t you get frustrated with it? And to think - someone who puts that much effort into judging you upfront is likely to keep judging things about you all your life, with no end to playing games… Stressful, no thank you.
neurotypical people do this too lol. everyone is a bit different. although I’m not neurotypical so I guess take that with a grain of salt
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I think nothing has ever been enough of a hindrance to be selected out evolutionarily which is why non-neurotypical people exist. Just my head theory though
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