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I hate that I can’t tell if this is satire or not.
Same. I genuinely cant tell if poking fun or legitimate complaint about products he actually bought.
I hate this reality.
The product is real, I looked it up.
If you can’t hack the bed I’m not sleeping with you ever again
Is your futon open source ? I have driver issues with my stack of hay
Invest in orthopedic mattress and linen sheets instead of this crap.
Maybe you don’t live somewhere where the average summer temperatures are 30C or higher. I’m those places, this would be a great product; your alternatives are to swelter all night, or A/C your house. A self-cooling bed would be more energy efficient.
I just took a trip down south in the US and obsessively monitored the weather back home and pined for it haha.
92F (33C) where I was at, 68F (20C) at home.
Temps here are around 30°c. I’d love to have a cold bed lol.
Note that I bought a Pod earlier on and have been upgraded to Pod 4 from warranty due to leak. It was obnoxiously cloud controlled from the start, but originally was much cheaper than now and it included a mattress and there was no mandatory monthly fee to just use the damn thing. I will give them credit that the Pod 4 is quite comfortable, the cooling/heating is nice, and the device is nice and quiet. For the most part the hardware design hits it out of the park, except for their aversion to local controls, which seems mostly driven by their software bullshit.
So first, that hardware control they added isn’t exactly awesome. People kept demanding buttons on the base or a remote or something. They smugly declared that modeling the earbud ‘tap N times to do an operation’ was the “correct” way because remotes are too easy to lose and no one would want to touch the base. Earbuds have to settle for that crap because of lack of surface area to control, your whole ass bed doesn’t have to make concessions to crappy hardware UI. So now I have double tap, or triple tap that has different meanings based on context, and even then only if the bed is ‘on’ which you can only do from the app and it turns itself ‘off’ automatically, so you can’t just ‘cheat’ and use the local hardware controls because those only are enabled at the behest of their bullshit cloud service.
For the software side, it’s trying to force you to go to their servers for no damn reason for the consumer. It will only deign to talk to a smartphone long enough to get connected to their cloud presence, and only toward that function. It also wants to “auto-control” your temperature and will frequently decide it knows better than you how you want the temperature to be and auto-adjust. It general the whole thing reeks of “we are smarter than you, and we will be all weird about all sorts of facets of this thing”.
And of course, it shows in their pricing. They got rid of the mattress and raised the price to $3,000 for just the cover and also now mandate a $17/month subscription plan on top of that for new customers (we grandfathered into the old situation, no monthly plan as well as what was a more reasonably priced product).
No way in hell would I buy it as it stands now, but if they at least enabled local control, ditched the monthly payment requirement bullshit and cut the price back, then I would be an unambiguous fan.
Why the fuck would anyone buy this?
I hate that there is (apparently) an actual market for this product. We live in a society of idiots.
Uhh no offense to you since I kind of included you in the idiots category there.
Frankly, I was super reluctant even back then, but I’m not the only one in the household so my vote is not the only one that counts.
In terms of water based temperature controlled bed, there were two options at the time I could see, Chilipad and Eight Sleep. I favored the local controls of Chilipad, but reviewers really seemed to prefer the Eight Sleep for noise and comfort of the pad, and at the time they were fairly competitive price wise with the cloud based control at the time being a nuisance, but not enough to overcome the review advantage Eight Sleep had. Also Eight Sleep had mattress included back then and that was a plus for them, since we needed a new mattress anyway.
I will say the comfort of the temperature control is fantastic, after trying a lot of solutions to try to get it done, water actually got it there. I am a big fan of the general product category. If one is into sleep tracking, I suppose this is the most comfortable way to do it, though I don’t understand the general value of that use case personally.
Now, I’m still not happy about the cloud control facet, but I’m tolerating it so long as it is free. If they shut down my grandfathered status, then I’m going to FreeSleep up my device. If it should stop working, then I’ll probably go ChiliPad if they haven’t gone as badly. I can’t imagine selecting Eight Sleep at it’s price point and subscription model at this point in time, but back then it seemed a competitive choice.
I had to Google this… I hate this shit. How brain dead do you have to be to buy a bed with a subscription service!? This is some cybertruck level bullshit
Agreed, I’ve got a normal-assed king size bed with a regular dumb heated blanket and different sheets for summer and winter. I’m sure as fuck not gonna pay some company a monthly fee to dictate the capabilities of my bed.
begrudgingly updating controls forcing server/auth AI temperature modifications
Sounds like they are circling the drain IMO.
Wonder If I can pick up a mattress/pad on the cheap after they go under and DIY a solution.
I’ve seen two things.
One was a guy that picked up a used cover without the base station and hooked it up to an aquarium temperature controller, replacing all the brains. No biometrics, but who cares.
Another is https://github.com/throwaway31265/free-sleep Though no idea if, for example, Pod 5 implemented signed firmware or a future product will to block it, and it requires some disassembly and extra equipment to replace the firmware.
So that black mirror episode wasn’t fiction?
… Maybe unplug it?
Then it would just be a bed!
Makes me recall something from years ago. My future ex-wife at the time was telling me about the drama when someone she knew’s car key’s battery had gone flat and they couldn’t get into their car, and had to call RACQ etc.
I said ‘you can still just put the key in the lock and turn it, you know?’. That apparently hadn’t occurred to them.
Obviously the heating coil, power source and variable resistor combo was too dependable for our planned obsolence society.
https://www.eightsleep.com/product/pod-cover/
It’s real. I was legitimately expecting to feel foolish for believing it.
There’s one born every minute.
haha funny joke. wait wdym this isn’t some random twitter account making up unrealistic funny scenarios? whatt
I clicked on this, and it’s immediately asking for my email. No big surprises there.
This however is the copy:
EXCLUSIVE
Unlock your surprise
Sign up to receive your surprise and start sleeping better todayWith the big glowing confirm button labelled “Get my surprise” and the dark pattern barely visible skip link “I don’t want a surprise”.
I was aware of the existence of these things but had never paid them the slightest mind, this is just… ick.
The cooling functions sounds great, without the supscription ai shit
Yeah, this sounds like a great idea, with some AI bullshit thrown in.
“AI controlled” 🤪
When did having basic microprocessors become AI controlled?
AI is when there’s no buttons and you just have to hope the software gives the output you were hoping for
When we started letting tech-bros on social media hype up AI like it would be the savior for all humanity and in just a few short years we’ll all be sailing on our AI-powered yachts with AI-powered martinis and sacks of AI-powered cash from our AI-powered stock trades.
Then when they started getting snippy and biting back and saying how it “democratizes art” and it lets us spend more time working so the AI can do our art and writing, we didn’t laugh and then drive them into the FUCKING SEA, instead we all politely respected their opinions and now we have at least a decade of useless, incremental “advances” to products we don’t want.
You can love AI all you want, but the moment you go to bat for the corporate slop being pushed on us, you’re one of them.
🥇🥇🥇
A gold medal for each paragraph. If I could I’d buy you Lemmy Lanthanum.
It’s such a stupid buzzword and it pisses me off. aI controlled fan. Sandwich made by AI recipe. It’s like when everything was HD. HD sunglasses.
I mean, every time I update my glasses it feels like everything is UHD for a couple of days.
I have updated to 4K sunglasses. So much clearer
Age of Empires had AI before it was cool.
And you weren’t gonna tell us that they can fix glaucoma??
The new term for algorithm these days is AI.
AlgorIthm
Shoots self in foot
Bleeds out and dies
Fuckin AI
To re-enable the Eight Sleep app, please drink verification can
a physical knob vs “state-of-the-art” AI
rule of thumb, “will this work without internet?”
because
a: sometimes WiFi is spotty in some places around there house
b: it means they need a server, and who knows how reliable their server is
c: if they go out of business the product you bought is now garbage
d: privacy concerns
e: who knows when they decide to go for a subscription based model and charge you again for what you bought, or to access the features you want
I sleep in a racecar bed because I’m a big boy.
My mom’s gonna get me a radio so I can talk to all the other car beds.
Yeah, but it’s a sweet car bed. Did you get the CB radio installed yet so you can talk to other car beds?
I’m firmly against racecar beds. In fact, I want the opposite of a racecar bed. I want a racecar bed.
I feel the same way about taco cat.
I want an aerogavin bed.
