Telling them won’t make things easier, for them or you. I can’t emphasize that enough. What, exactly, are you expecting to happen? Hugs and an understanding goodbye? Not. Gonna. Happen.

Have you considered not telling them?

A crisis causes people to react in severe ways, and believe me, people will consider this a crisis. There will be tears of sadness and anger. You’ll hear the same tiresome lecture, and have to answer the same condescending questions, over and over. If you ask them to keep things within the immediate family, other people will “magically” find out (the most generous interpretation is that you’re laying something incredibly heavy on your family; it’s to be expected that some of them will need to talk about it with friends.) Some of the people you didn’t tell will even have the nerve to contact you, and force their moral “advice” down your throat.

Best case: your final interactions with the people you love will be sad and painful, and perhaps angry. Worst case: you’ll be put on informal “suicide watch”, and learn to hate and distrust the people you expected support from.

Spend some quality time with whoever you were planning to tell. Say goodbye in your heart, but don’t tell them it’s goodbye. Make some pleasant final memories.