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Cake day: June 21st, 2023

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  • One time I was working my way down the bread/dairy aisle at a grocery store. It’s one of the wider aisles there, if 2 people pulled their carts off to the side, a third person could squeeze down the middle as long as those first two took a little care to not stick out into the aisle too much

    Of course they never do

    So there I am coming down the middle of the aisle, trying to squeeze between some idiot agonizing over which container of sour cream they should buy, and some moron who can’t decide on a loaf of bread who are stopped directly across from each other, uttering plenty of “'scuze me/pardon me/lemme just squeeze through heres” and of course neither of them move an inch

    I nearly make it, but do tap one of their carts a bit in the process

    I give her a quick “sorry” and continue on my way.

    Then she yells down after me with a very indignant “excuse you

    Lady, you were the one blocking the aisle without any situational awareness, and I already apologized, fucking die mad about it.


  • 2 bedrooms (one is an office that doubles as a guest room with a pull-out couch) 2½ baths

    The two full baths are attached to the bedrooms and are pretty cramped with pretty cheap fittings, but they do the trick. The powder room is downstairs, it’s kind of an odd shape due to where it is in the house, and weirdly big but not in a way that makes it particularly more useable and still manages to feel a little cramped. No real counter space to speak of, or other storage options besides the cabinet under the sink. The master bedroom is weirdly huge, and the office is an ok size, but in both cases the way they’re laid out with doors and windows, outlets, etc. often leaves us wishing we had a couple more inches any time we think about rearranging or getting new furniture.

    We could only afford this house because it was my mother in laws, she sold it too us for cheap when she moved in with her mother to take care of her.

    My parents have 3 bedrooms, 2 full bathrooms, a powder room, and then I guess it might be called a ¾ bathroom in the basement. The master bath is pretty sweet with a whirlpool tub (albeit a fairly small one all things considered) 2 sinks, and a shower (the shower is nothing particularly special) and a TV.

    The bathroom between the two other bedrooms is nothing too special, but has a nice-sized linen closet and pretty decent counter space.

    The powder room is small, nothing too special there.

    The basement bathroom has a sink, a weirdly huge linen close, and a shower stall, no tub.

    The guy who originally owned the home was a landscaper who did a lot of business with a local builder so they tricked the house out for him. He ran his business from the home and we’re pretty sure that was the point of the basement bathroom, he could go in through the basement door and shower without tracking dirt through the house.

    The master bedroom is huge, 2 walk-in closets, high ceilings, plenty of space for a king sized bed, a plethora of dressers, a couple small bookshelves, a desk, and a chaise with room to spare. The other 2 bedrooms are decent sized, nothing too special, with pretty huge closets.

    It’s a pretty sweet house, I wouldn’t be surprised if my parents could get a cool million for it if they sold it now, the stars kind of aligned, they’d just inherited a bit of money, the market was right, and the original owner killed himself there, so they paid less than half of that probably about 15 years ago now.

    The house we lived in before that had 3 bedrooms, none of which were particularly big, and one bathroom.

    The apartment I was living in when I first moved out (to live with my then-girlfriend-now-wife, and a roommate) had 3 bedrooms that were oddly spacious. The master bedroom was pretty big, but again weirdly laid-out, with an en suite bathroom that was nothing too special, it had a pretty decent sized shower that was nothing too special, and there was a second bathroom by the two bedrooms with your typical shower/bathtub. The two other bedrooms were decent-size, our roommates technically had a walk-in closet that doubled as the utility closet for the water heater (and if I miss one thing about that apartment it was the water heater, you could practically brew tea with water from the faucet and it never seemed to run out, and since the apartment wasn’t all that big it was almost instant) one of those bedrooms started off as mine, because my wife and I had just recently started dating and I wanted to have my space in case things didn’t work out between us (we’d been friends for a good while before that and our plans to move in together had been in the works well before we started dating) but eventually it became her office/storage and additional living space.

    Honestly I liked that apartment, I could probably still be living there pretty happily if they didn’t keep jacking the rent up. It was a first floor apartment with a washer and dryer and a decent little patio, my only major gripe was that the kitchen was tiny and there was no decent place to put any sort of dining table (at least not with how we used the space, we’d rather have a decent entertainment center setup and couches for entertaining) so we ate at the coffee table or on tray tables.



  • I think there’s at least 3 factors at play here.

    First, you’re probably living in a largely eurocentric bubble. You’re not seeing other mythologies because they’re not being marketed to you, and in some cases you may not even realize some of the ways that those mythologies and folklore and such are being presented to you because you just don’t know what to look for (for example, Dragon Ball, in the beginning, borrowed very heavily from the 16th century Chinese novel Journey to the West, which is a hugely important book in Asian literature, and I swear every couple of years there’s some new adaptation coming out, but it’s not nearly as well known to Western audiences) and translations can get a little wonky, if you watch a movie or read a book from a non-western culture, instead of naming specific deities or other mythological figures, the translator may figure that no one reading the translation is going to know who that is so they’ll translate it as something generic like “god” or “a great hero” instead of naming names.

    Second, Western media is huge, and kind of overshadows a lot of other cultures. White Americans making movies in Hollywood are going to tend to pull from their own cultural backgrounds, and that often includes Greek, Norse, and Roman mythology.

    Finally, a lot of it comes down to which mythologies we have actual written records of. The Norse, Greeks, and Romans all wrote about their gods to some extent, Slavic people, on the other hand, did not write until after they’d been converted to Christianity (the Cyrillic alphabet used in Russian and some other Slavic languages takes it’s name from Saint Cyril, who helped to christianize the Slavic peoples, and was developed by his followers,) so there’s no real first-hand accounts of their beliefs and practices, only second-hand accounts from other cultures who interacted with them and wrote down what they observed, and people recalling stories they’d heard about earlier times, and that comes with them inserting their own biases and interpretations and just plain getting things wrong. So if you wanted to write something about, for example, the Slavic gods Perun and Veles, you probably wouldn’t have as much decent source material to work from as if you wanted to write about the roughly equivalent Norse gods- Thor and Loki.


  • stripping to her underwear

    It varies of course, but most public nudity laws I’ve seen pretty much only specify that genitals and female breasts (and sometimes not even breasts) need to be covered.

    There’s a picture in the article, she’s wearing some fairly conservative undies, I’ve seen people wear more revealing clothes just out shopping at Walmart or going for a jog, and she’s certainly showing less skin than you’d see at most beaches or swimming pools.

    At worst you might get questioned by the cops about why you’re out walking around in your underwear, but unless you seem like you’re in the middle of a mental health crisis, or refusing to leave a business or otherwise causing a disturbance, it’s kind of a stretch to say you’d be arrested, at least in most halfway modern countries if the cops are enforcing the laws properly (which is of course not a given)


  • It depends a bit on what you mean by “stealing”

    If you were to break into the coke vault, hack into their computers, threaten or blackmail a coke executive, etc. in order to obtain it, those would all be illegal acts on their own.

    But if you reverse-engineered the recipe yourself, or just happened to come across it in some legal fashion you could do pretty much whatever you want with it- publish the recipe, make your own cola and sell it (can’t call it “coca-cola” or “Coke” though because of trademarks and such,) try to sell the recipe to one of Coke’s competitors, etc.

    Anyone with the recipe is going to have a hell of a time trying to do anything with it though because one of the ingredients is allegedly still coca leaf extract and coke is pretty much the only entity that is allowed to do anything with the stuff.


  • I’ve always been lucky and my skin is pretty bulletproof, I could probably just about wash my face with acetone and shave with a broken beer bottle and be none the worse for it.

    I shower, normally every day but occasionally skip a day or two due to weather, lack of motivation, and how much I’ve been sweating, with Dr Bronners Peppermint soap and a washcloth.

    I like Dr Bronners because it’s the best I’ve found at stripping the wax out of my moustache. I also find the mint to be nice and refreshing, especially after a hot day. It’s also nice that its organic, fair trade, etc. and since it can be used for pretty much everything I like it for backpacking (I tend to go unscented for that purpose, but if I intend to brush my teeth with it mint in the way to go, still a bit gross and soapy tasting, don’t exactly recommend it but it does the trick in a pinch)

    If we want to count it as skincare, though it’s more hair care I suppose, my moustache wax of choice is Firehouse Wacky Tacky

    I shave my head with a double edge safety razor, I like Feather blades. I lather up with whatever bar of soap smells good to me when I bought it and looks like it will fit in my shaving bowl, right now I think I’m using Dr Squatch Bay Rum because they sold it in the checkout line of ace hardware and the line was moving slow one day leaving me with nothing much to do to entertain myself but stiff some soaps.

    Sometimes, instead, I splash on some lectric shave and use a foil shaver on my head.

    Then I splash on some aftershave. I used to rotate through the usual drug store brands- Brut, Pinaud Clubman, Aqua Velva, and Old Spice, but then I met my wife and it turns out she really likes me in Old Spice, so I don’t switch it up too often anymore. I do tend to get a bottle of cheap bay rum to use over the summer though.

    I use whatever beard oil or balm smells good to me when I run out and find myself needing more. I honestly couldn’t even tell you what brand I have kicking around currently, I use it pretty infrequently, mostly when I’m dressing up and feel like my beard could use a little extra taming and shininess. I tend to like woodsy scents like cedar.

    When my hands feel a little dry and cracked, which isn’t a very common issue for me, I use Duke Cannon Bloody Knuckles balm. Again, I’m pretty sure that was an impulse buy from the checkout line of a hardware store or something, but I think it works pretty well. My wife probably uses it more than I do and she has an actual skincare routine so I guess she agrees.

    And for deodorant, I again like old spice. It works for me, and I’ve used it pretty consistently since I was in about 4th or 5th grade when we had a basic sex-ed/some-of-you-stink-so-use-deodorant-please assembly where they handed out a small stick of it to all the guyse Again, apparently my wife likes old spice so that worked out well, and I can usually find a 2-pack of it at most grocery stores and such that is probably the best value in the deodorant aisle.




  • It’s been a long time and I’m not sure of it’s current state, but some friends and I used to have a blast play Artemis Spaceship Bridge Simulator (I think there’s a couple other games out there now that are similar)

    You kind of need the right setup for it to work well, a big TV or projector you can hook up to a computer and everyone needs their own laptop, etc.

    The basic idea is- picture the bridge of the enterprise (or your starship of choice) you’ve got a bunch of people with their own consoles responsible for different aspects of the ships operation, the helm, engineering, weapons, etc. That’s what you’re doing.

    I think at some point they added support for support fighters and such to accompany the main starship so if you have more people they have something to do.

    We also made up a couple extra positions, like a captain who didn’t really have his own console, he just got his own chair front and center and a fancy hat and gave out orders.




  • My dog likes to steal things when we’re out of the house and leave them on the stairs or on our bed.

    She’s not a breed that’s known for having a particularly soft mouth, their claim to fame is probably the opposite if anything (malinois) so it’s kind of impressive when I find an avocado or a martini glass somewhere unexpected without even the slightest bruise.

    We joke that they’re her “emotional support objects.”


  • So here’s a little brief history of the falklands that I’ve posted before that people seem to usually enjoy. I’m no historian or anything of the sort, so take my thoughts on this for what it’s worth (and I am certainly biased being an American, don’t exactly get a whole lot of Argentinian history books to study, and most of the Spanish I know is food-related, so if someone wants to enlighten me more on the Argentinian side of things, I welcome the education.) I’m aiming as much to keep this fun and light-hearted as I am for historical accuracy.

    In general my understanding is that the British were the first people to land there, didn’t really do much with it at that time, and pretty much just said “finders keepers” then left.

    Maybe worth noting, there were no indigenous inhabitants there, so that’s probably about as ethical as colonization can get.

    Then France showed up and set up shop since the British weren’t doing anything with it. Britain came back and also set up shop, and it’s not totally clear if either of them even knew the other was there. France eventually decided to fuck off, and let Spain have their bit of the Falklands.

    Spain and Britain coexisted for a while, had some scuffles, but more or less worked things out. Eventually Britain pulled out to focus on other things but still considered their “finders keepers” claim to be valid.

    Spain eventually pulled out as well, so for a little while no one was really doing much of anything with it officially.

    Argentina (technically Buenos Aires at the time if we want to split hairs, I’m going to just use Argentina and Britain to keep the sides easy to follow) comes along, and decides it’s theirs, since they split off from Spain they figure they get the falklands as part of the package since Spain was claiming ownership at the time, although Brittain was still holding to their “finders keeps” claim, Spain and later Argentina basically just countered with “losers weepers” and this is basically the root of the whole conflict.

    Put a little more professionally, basically Britain’s claim is they were there first and that claim has always been valid whether they were doing anything with the Islands or not. Argentina’s claim is that Brittain pulled out they left the islands up for grabs, and since Spain was the last country trying to do anything with them, it belongs to them since they’re laying claim to Spain’s former holdings in the region.

    Argentina gave some German dude permission to set up a colony for them there to fish and hunt feral cows. Eventually he gets into a fight with an American navy captain over fishing and hunting rights, Captain America kicks their ass a bit and declares the colonial government disolved, and pretty much continues on his merry way. Argentina tries to get things there started back up again but never quite gets their shit back together in the Falklands. A little while later the Brits come back around, still claiming finders keepers, and take charge of everything again, and this time the colonies stick and continue to grow. Argentina spends the next hundred years or so muttering “this is bullshit” to themselves.

    Around the 1960s, Britain starts talking about decolonizing, it was kind of all the rage among the European colonial powers at the time, and Argentina gets excited thinking they’re going to finally get the Falklands. Britain even quietly floats the idea of giving them the islands, figuring the Islanders would just kind of accept that decision if it was made, and running these islands from halfway around the world was getting kind of expensive. Turns out though that pretty much everyone on the Falklands is pretty damn happy to be British subjects (sort of a novel experience for Britain, historically not many British colonies have been happy to be British colonies, hell, half of Brittain proper sometimes isn’t too happy to be part of Britain) and don’t really want to be part of Argentina, which made things a bit complicated, and Britain needed some time to figure things out.

    Argentina gets kind of impatient with all of this, and eventually decided “fuck it, we’ll just take them ourselves.” Britain cannot abide Argentina’s inability to wait patiently in the queue and was starting to really wrap their heads around the idea that the Falklands would rather stay part of Britain, and so we get the Falklands war.

    Britain wins, Argentina goes back to muttering to themselves, and that pretty much brings us up to the present day.





  • So ignoring the technical problem of how it could actually be done, let’s assume we somehow did it, cut every cable, and somehow blocked every cell tower and satellite from somehow connecting to North Korea to the rest of the world.

    For the average north korean citizen, probably nothing much changes, most of them don’t have much access to the internet to begin with.

    For those who do, the elites, people in university, those government, military, etc. it will probably worry a bit.

    For the elites who get to enjoy the internet as a luxury, probably not too much changes. I doubt that except for maybe the very top echelons of DPRK society, the Kim family for example (and maybe not even some of them,) anyone is getting totally unrestricted access to the global Internet. They’re probably limited to mostly a bunch of north korean-hosted websites, and unless they’re relying on data centers and such abroad (and they very well might be,) there’s not really much we can do to take them down unless we really want to go in and attack all of the internal Internet infrastructure.

    It’s going to hamper their universities and such, sucks for them, probably no great loss for the world, the next big scientific break through probably wasn’t coming from the hermit kingdom anyway.

    It will definitely hurt their ability to conduct espionage, cyber attacks and such, that goes both ways though and it also makes it harder for other countries to spy on them.

    They will do their usual sabre-rattling in response, maybe even going a bit above and beyond their usual mostly empty gestures, but probably nothing that’s going to lead to any actual escalation p


  • I think you have some faulty assumptions here.

    Israel is very reliant on US support to be sure, but not totally reliant on us. They have their own military industrial complex and could ramp that up if needed, they have their own nuclear program, they would certainly have to scale back in some aspects, but I don’t think there’s much that we can do that would stop the war in its tracks. They’d change tactics, and Israel can be very creative, look at the recent pager bomb thing.

    That’s not saying that we should continue supporting them and sending them supplies. I just don’t think it would be the quick end you’re thinking it would be.

    If they knew the US wasn’t going to step in, we might see other countries, Iran perhaps, step up their involvement. If Israel starts getting desperate they might do some incredibly stupid things, like using those nukes, their mindset seems to very much that if they think they’re going down they’re going to take as many people with them as possible.

    There is basically no chance you’re going to be able to land that boat at any port in Israel/Gaza and let 10k people loose. You’ll be stopped at the port if not even sooner, I’d honestly be a little amazed if you even be allowed to set sail in the first place.

    While hamas is overall arguably on the right side of this conflict, don’t mistake that for meaning that they are an overall good organization. 10k Americans would make for some damn good human shields and hostages and they’d snatch every one of you up that they can. It’s not going to be as simple as just chilling in Gaza clogging up streets so Israel can’t get through (assuming Israel doesn’t just decide that your enemy combatants too and wow you down) you’re probably just as likely to end up as a Hamas prisoner and spend months or years in some pretty terrible conditions hoping for rescue.

    And the idea that you’re going to get 10k to sign on is pretty laughable, I’d be amazed if you could get 100.

    I’m just scraping the surface with a few thoughts off the top of my heads.


  • I’d probably push it back to a little over 100 years to include WWI, the fall of the Ottoman Empire, and the British Mandate for Palestine, since that all set the stage for Israel being founded pretty directly, and there had already been a pretty substantial movement for Jews to immigrate to the region by about the '30s (known as the “Fifth Aliyah”) so a bit outside of your 80 year range.

    But of course, none of these events happen in a vacuum, if you want to get really nitpicky, you can start talking about the events that led to world war 1, trace them way back, through the crusades, the birth of Muhammad, Christianity, the Roman empire, all the way back to the bronze age, and maybe even further if you were able to somehow find decent historical records going that far back.

    Trying to point to one single event as the one that kicked off a certain conflict is tough, because there was always something that led up to that event too, and when you try to unravel it, before too long you might come to a very Douglass Adams-y conclusion that it all started when our first ape ancestors decided to come down from the trees, only for someone else to say that the trees had been a mistake in the first place and that we never should have left the oceans.