I hard disagree with your position here, including your allegedly heinous example of bonding with a widow because you also lost your SO! Can you imagine?! Humans bonding over a common experience?
All Lives Matter isn’t fucked up because it believes that all lives really matter, that surface explanation is actually quite virtuous until you learn the context surrounding it. It’s only when you find out it came about as a rebuttal by racists to the Black Lives Matter movement that it starts to take on a sinister note.
The GP saying he gets raped and assaulted by women too is not in any way comparable to the all lives matter slogan and you’re delusional for drawing that comparison.
Women do experience these types of things more, everyone fucking knows that. We should not be dismissing men who are experiencing it too or telling them to hush up cause the ladies are venting right now. Instead we should be encouraging fellow humans to bond and find common ground so that we can move past this bullshit and deal with the real problems? The sexual assault perpetrators - who yes, are admittedly mostly men.
Why men commit more crimes in general is beyond the scope of our discussion…
including your allegedly heinous example of bonding with a widow because you also lost your SO! Can you imagine?! Humans bonding over a common experience?
I used that example, because I am a widow myself. My fiance passed a few years ago. I don’t mean to imply people do this out of malice, just that they try to “make you feel better” by relating to your grief, but unfortunately grief doesn’t work like that. When I am grieving, more than anything I’m just looking for someone to listen and understand, not try and tell me “it’s normal” or “this happens to everyone, don’t feel so bad”, because as genuine and heartfelt that sentiment is it is not helpful. I’m not immune to it either, I met a man on the bus who’d lost his daughter, and my first reaction was to mention my fiance rather than listen and let him let it out. I realized what I was doing and reflected about it later, I saw how he reacted and how sharing that type of pain doesn’t mitigate it, what you really want is to talk to someone without comparing tragedy. There is a time and place for that, but not in those moments of grief and pain.
Yes, I mentioned that explicitly in my comment, did you read all of it? I never said that it was okay for that type of thing to happen to men, and that we should talk about it. And just like with letting women have the floor, we should allow men to have it when the convo is centered on that issue. I don’t see what the issue with giving each issue their own time and space is, we need to have focus if we’re talking about two very different, yet similar scenarios, in order to have some kind of real way to find a solution proper to both.
I still don’t agree that finding common ground over grief or any other aspect of the human experience is a bad thing.
Sure when the man on the bus told you he lost his daughter if you had said “you think that’s bad, wait til you hear what I lost” that would be totally inappropriate. Telling him “I also lost someone close to me and know the pain and emotional turmoil that causes” is completely appropriate and is very human.
I hard disagree with your position here, including your allegedly heinous example of bonding with a widow because you also lost your SO! Can you imagine?! Humans bonding over a common experience?
All Lives Matter isn’t fucked up because it believes that all lives really matter, that surface explanation is actually quite virtuous until you learn the context surrounding it. It’s only when you find out it came about as a rebuttal by racists to the Black Lives Matter movement that it starts to take on a sinister note.
The GP saying he gets raped and assaulted by women too is not in any way comparable to the all lives matter slogan and you’re delusional for drawing that comparison.
Women do experience these types of things more, everyone fucking knows that. We should not be dismissing men who are experiencing it too or telling them to hush up cause the ladies are venting right now. Instead we should be encouraging fellow humans to bond and find common ground so that we can move past this bullshit and deal with the real problems? The sexual assault perpetrators - who yes, are admittedly mostly men.
Why men commit more crimes in general is beyond the scope of our discussion…
I used that example, because I am a widow myself. My fiance passed a few years ago. I don’t mean to imply people do this out of malice, just that they try to “make you feel better” by relating to your grief, but unfortunately grief doesn’t work like that. When I am grieving, more than anything I’m just looking for someone to listen and understand, not try and tell me “it’s normal” or “this happens to everyone, don’t feel so bad”, because as genuine and heartfelt that sentiment is it is not helpful. I’m not immune to it either, I met a man on the bus who’d lost his daughter, and my first reaction was to mention my fiance rather than listen and let him let it out. I realized what I was doing and reflected about it later, I saw how he reacted and how sharing that type of pain doesn’t mitigate it, what you really want is to talk to someone without comparing tragedy. There is a time and place for that, but not in those moments of grief and pain.
Yes, I mentioned that explicitly in my comment, did you read all of it? I never said that it was okay for that type of thing to happen to men, and that we should talk about it. And just like with letting women have the floor, we should allow men to have it when the convo is centered on that issue. I don’t see what the issue with giving each issue their own time and space is, we need to have focus if we’re talking about two very different, yet similar scenarios, in order to have some kind of real way to find a solution proper to both.
Sorry you lost your fiancé, that’s awful.
I still don’t agree that finding common ground over grief or any other aspect of the human experience is a bad thing.
Sure when the man on the bus told you he lost his daughter if you had said “you think that’s bad, wait til you hear what I lost” that would be totally inappropriate. Telling him “I also lost someone close to me and know the pain and emotional turmoil that causes” is completely appropriate and is very human.