A mountain of research has linked loneliness to an increased risk of dementia, depression, anxiety, heart disease, stroke and early death.
Loneliness is officially a health emergency in California’s San Mateo County, which is located in the San Francisco Bay Area and includes part of Silicon Valley.
The county’s Board of Supervisors passed a resolution on Tuesday that declared loneliness a public health crisis and pledged to explore measures that promote social connection in the community.
It’s the first county in the U.S. to make such a declaration.
Quick random tangent. I feel like churches were a great social gathering place. Now so many are leaving religion, or at least churches behind. The sense of community is dying and it’s hard to build a physical social network anymore.
Edit: I guess I should have been more clear, I am not religious and stopped going to church around 14 when my parents stopped forcing me to go so over 20 years ago now. But in my lifetime that was a huge social gathering place. Movie theaters are dead here, there are no roller rinks or anything like that. It’s just sitting in bars or coffee shops but even there many people rightfully like to stick to themselves with headphones on instead of chatting with strangers.
I just used churches as an example as in my life I saw their utility for meeting a community of people.
I would argue it not the loss of Church’s by themselves, but their loss without a good replacement. You can’t go anywhere in America and gather without paying. There’s no place to just…exist. Even Churches usually required dues.
I’d argue the “not paying” part isn’t the problem. It would be nice not to have to pay, but most Americans could stomach a couple bucks to, say take up a barstool for a couple of hours.
The main issue IMO is that all the third spaces we do have are either dedicated to niche hobbies, or the consumption of drugs. Only people into really nerdy shit will actually go to a gaming store, people generally only go to coffee shops in the AM, and going to the bar every night is…we’ll be polite and say “unhealthy”.
Public parks would be cool, but I don’t think most people utilize them that way. I don’t know myself, because it is hot enough here going to a park is an exercise in self harm for most of the year.
I think the best idea I have is some kind if mall, where all of the stores have been replaced with activity spaces.
That’s very true. I get basically all that from my local kink community but I think less niche hobbies could really use our model of “let’s all go grab dinner one Saturday a month and just chat”. It could easily be applied to shit like people who like a genre of book or something like that. I think you definitely do need something to fall back on that you share in common and enjoy enough to leave the house though.
Really what we need are dedicated community centers. Libraries are trying but that’s not what they’re there for
Anybody who wants to get mad about this, look up the sociology concept of third place.
Here’s a great ~10 minute video from Not Just Bikes on YouTube about third places and how current city planing trends promote social isolation.
This concept and this video are so fantastic. Goes to show how broken N America is, I’ve been around the block a few times and never really had a chance to stop at a local…
this.
I’d argue the death of small businesses by large faceless corporations with no ties to the local communities has done more to kill local communities than church attendance.
Used to be your neighbors ran the stores you went to. You knew your money was helping your friends and staying with your community. You could have a little pride knowing your participating in your local community.
Now the small shops downtown are all gone and all that’s left are the big box store chains. And those big stores don’t invest in the community. They take everything they can and give it to their shareholders.
We need to break up everything.
I’d rather be lonely than silly though.
Or rather lonely than, you know, filled with hatred and looking to hurt people not like me
Or rather lonely than waking up early on Sunday morning and using up most of the only two days I have off in a week.
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In the US, we have also lost a lot of that “sense of community” as we have moved to a more suburban lifestyle. Our houses are spread out, our businesses are spread out and we spend more time alone and not interacting with others from our local community. For example, we don’t walk to the store to buy groceries, a mode of transport where we are more likely to meet and interact with others. Instead, we get in our cars, alone and drive to the store. Once there, we might have interactions with others, but that not a guarantee. We then get back in our cars and drive home. There is no “public square” anymore, we don’t spend out time in “third spaces” (places other than home or work) in the same way that urbanized dwellers do.
While it had a lot of other baggage, churches were one of those “third spaces”. They provided a place for people to meet and socialize on a regular basis. This still worked for the suburban lifestyle, because it kept people regularly meeting and connecting in a way that nothing else did. The church also provided an way to organize other events beyond the basic worship services. As people have left churches, that organization has been lost and not replaced with anything. Even worse, when leaving a church, it’s not uncommon for the people of that church to ostracize the person leaving.
Ultimately, I’m not sure what the fix is. Religion seems to have run its course in modern society. People are leaving it because the baggage is too much to bear for the social benefits. Suburbanism is likely here to stay in some capacity, though there is always going to be an ebb and flow of people moving into and out of cities. But, that makes it hard to create vibrant “third spaces” for people to meet and interact. Also, those folks whom most need that socialization are probably also the same people who are less likely to see it out. I do think social media can help, as it allows folks to find and interact with others. But, it is also very easy to connect with some pretty horrible people and groups.
I’m not sure I agree with loneliness being a “health emergency”. But, it also seems like the county government is just trying to marshal resource to try and figure the problem out. So, good on 'em.
"Social isolation and loneliness were associated with a 29% increased risk of heart disease and a 32% risk of stroke.”
”Increased risk of dementia 50%”
https://www.cdc.gov/emotional-wellbeing/social-connectedness/loneliness.htm
I think you misunderstand me. I’m not denying that loneliness has health effects. I just question if it’s actually an emergency or if this is just a bombastic response to an issue, because that’s what they see as a viable way to get funding and attention. If we declare every problem to be an emergency, then that sort of response becomes the new norm and nothing is actually treated as an emergency.
Give me some money and I’ll let you dance and pray and hug others like yourself in my private backyard.
Singles looking to mingle night, singles and couples, not looking to mingle night, and orgy night. Those are three good nights to start off with!
Setting aside the object of religious worship for a moment, purely from a secular view Daniel Dennett’s book “Breaking the Spell: Religion as a Natural Phenomenon” goes into many ways in which religion was an positively adaptive force that shaped the development of humanity, leading it from a tribal nature (that could be extended to the country level) to one where larger groups that share common beliefs (like Democracy I guess) can coexist with lesser friction. So even without a god, religion was an important stepping stone to get us to today, which implies neither that it is still needed anymore nor that it is not so needed, nor that something better might not exist but it does say how that route in particular was what WAS used bc it WORKED.
But like anything, let’s say a gun, the proper use is one thing while improper use is another, and it can be dangerous if misused. Probably talking on social media is even one of these things (it can get addictive and therefore become maladaptive)! People who hold a gun should be aware of its potential for misuse, not just to oneself but to those around them as well, and those who are not aware are unfit to hold it, while those who are aware yet do not care are absolute jerks. And similarly with religion. And yes, as you pointed out, similarly with atheism/agnosticism/apatheism (a newer word meaning those who simply DGAF one way or another), as changes intended to have been made for the better end up missing a few pieces.
I am not arguing for any religion or lack thereof in particular, simply saying that those who don’t know their history… well you know the thing:-D.
It’s like that passage from The Hogfather, where kids have to practice believing in the little lies - Santa, the Easter Bunny, etc - so they can believe the big lies like justice and mercy.
Test EVERYTHING against what you KNOW to be true - 1 Thessalonians 5:21. If only the (checks notes) “Bible” would be required reading for someone to stand behind a pulpit that purports to teach said text!:-( But then they would lose their power over the sheeple, so ofc it’s to their advantage that they do not.
Tbf, some ministers strongly advocate for being skeptical, even/especially of religious matters, I know of Andy Stanley, John Piper, and ofc the infamous inkling C.S. Lewis, and so very many others. But not all of them are so careful, and just like guns, if you are surrounded by people who are less than careful with them, then the presence of a few who are is of little comfort.
Exactly. A lot of my morality was developed by my catholic priest growing up. He taught me to question my beliefs against my knowledge, my soul, and my conscience. He taught me that his primary goal was for all of us to do good and avoid evil. And he told me and many of my fellow students at catholic school that he’d rather we grow up to be atheists because we came to that conclusion than Catholics because we were told to be growing up. He also fought the magisterium over gay marriage in the 00s because he wanted to perform his sister’s lesbian wedding.
I’m still deeply wary of Christians, but I’m no longer an atheist (paganism spoke to me). But nothing scares me like a religion that can be easily twisted and teaches that you’re holy if you do what it says.
Yeah a lot to unpack there. For one, if an article says “Science says that this new diet will…”, that doesn’t mean that actual SCIENCE itself is bad, it just means that some predatory source (reporter, politician, etc.) is using it improperly.
On the other hand, religion is fundamentally different: it actually is kinda bad - as Jesus Himself said: “Be ye not a Karen, fucking over everyone else without lifting a finger to help”. Compared to tribalism, it offers a leg up b/c billions of people can be considered part of the “in-group”, not just people whose faces you have already seen since birth.
And the part I was kinda focusing on: if someone who actually is - or rather, claims to be - part of that “in-crowd” sets themselves up as an authority figure, and e.g. declares themselves a non-denominational pastor and starts preaching the EXACT OPPOSITE MESSAGE than the Bible itself (Bible says: love one another, especially those who disagree with you; while christofascists say: kill the other side!), in that case is it “religion” itself that is bad, or is it instead the former example of a predatory source talking shit about it? The answer seems to me to be: “yes”.:-P
That said, there are MANY stupid people, and moreover there are MANY different ways to be incorrect (i.e. many many many fallacies), and religion is only one of them. Personally I think that in a hundred years or so, there will be fundamentalist atheists - not first-generation ones as you are talking about, but people who inherited their beliefs from their parents (or whoever), and who likewise shit onto every foundational principe that underlies that entire belief structure/system. The atheist mindset - which as I pointed out already, literally has a bible verse supporting it - is one thing, but since when do authentic beliefs matter to a “fundamentalist”? And yet even that term is unfair, b/c a TRUE fundamentalist would actually care about whatever it is that their belief systems require.
George Carlin: “It’s called the American Dream, b/c you have to be asleep to believe it.”:-P
To be real, to be true, to ACTUALLY believe the thing that you say that you believe, whatever that is, seems to be the hardest thing in the world to do. :-| Especially these days when virtually every word has been twisted into somehow meaning its precise opposite - e.g. the party that freed the slaves were the Republicans! Can you imagine Republicans giving a crap about black people these days, or Democrats legit caring about the poors!? (case in point: doing something to stop school shootings, these days) To identify a falsehood (of whatever type - chemistry, biology, physics, sociology, governance, etc.), you must know The Truth SO WELL that a falsehood cannot pass muster. And with all the knowledge, mixed in with misinformation/anti-knowledge, available to us these days, who can keep up with even a fraction of it all? But conversely, how can we justify not doing that?
I don’t understand why everyone is saying that loneliness is an epidemic and yet nobody is trying to develop solutions for it.
If it were up to me, I would give funding to social psychologists to have them develop social programs to reduce loneliness. I’m talking about programs that actually get strangers together physically, on a regular basis, to help them form real friendships and communities. (Like Meetup.com, but more structured and more effective.) There are lots of different ways this could be approached, and I wish researchers would start running some experiments to see what works.
Saw this the other day, blue state delivering. Ned Lamont turning the force and attention of Connecticut public health agencies toward meaningfully addressing this problem. Seems like a lot of smart people are invested in this in CT as a holistic approach.
https://portal.ct.gov/DPH/Newsroom/Press-Releases---2024/Social-connection
“As a nation and a state, we are seeing an epidemic of loneliness and isolation. The health impacts of this epidemic are very real – they are so significant and so widespread that the U.S. Surgeon General has put social isolation and loneliness on the same level as public health crises like tobacco addiction, AIDS, drunk driving, obesity, and gun violence.” said Lt. Governor Bysiewicz. “We’ve seen recent efforts emerging to address this crisis, and today marks an important next step in exploring how we, as a state, can best address this issue.”
Inspired by the work of U.S. Senator Chris Murphy and a recent advisory from the U.S. Surgeon General, the Social Connection Campaign will:
Facilitate collaboration on an inter-agency basis to identify opportunities to foster greater social connection.
Raise awareness of existing and new efforts by State Agencies that improve social connection.
Work with partners beyond state government (federal, municipal, nonprofit, private, grassroots orgs and the public) to identify gaps, opportunities, and ideas related to improving social connection.
“The Connecticut Department of Public Health is proud to be a part of the Social Connection Campaign and its mission of addressing the concerns of loneliness and isolation,” said Department of Public Health (DPH) Commissioner Manisha Juthani, MD. “There are several public health issues that are exacerbated by isolation. Some of these include chronic diseases, suicide and gun violence, children and adults with special health care needs, pregnant women who do not have access to proper pre-natal care, and the lack of proper eating habits and physical activity.”
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I think one problem is it’s so hard to trust strangers nowadays, hard to get to know who people really are.
